In the arms of the Father

As I sat in my rocker this morning reading the book, "Calm in my Chaos" by Elisabeth Corcoran; I came across an Author's note. She decided to write a letter to the children she will never have. It surprisingly touched an area in me that I did not know was there. The Holy Spirit whispered,"In this same way you can release them to me." In our 6 years of marriage we have experienced four miscarriages. Though the first one was the most traumatic, the others weigh in as well. Leaving a sadness in your heart that only God can repair.Realizing that I am not in control; I relinquished  control on this matter totally to the Father in an effort to move on with life. I thought that was all that needed to be done. Apparently not, so in obedience I began writing the letter......
                      Hi babies I will meet in Heaven,
            For some reason, I do not know, I wasn't able to supply the necessary ingredients to suffice life within me. Jesus met you to fill in for my inadequacy. Though He is holding you in Love's perfect arms, I sometimes think my arms would have been warm enough. "God knows best,"I tell myself; but it doesn't dull the sadness some days. Knowing that it is out of my control, I released you. There are so many things I will not get to do with you on this side of Heaven; like watching you grow, taking your first step, or reading to you. Dressing you,diapering you, praying for your health, rocking you, soothing you when your fever spikes or comforting you when you get hurt. I know you are okay. Because of you I know the Father God in way that some won't. I am learning to trust HIM with Life and knowing that he holds all in HIS hands. I love you my dears. Until we meet again, I will hold on to you in my heart......
                                                                                                  Love Mommy.

Since no one knows the future, who can tell what is to come?-----Ecclesiastes 8:7